“If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do is go to a state fair. Because five minutes at the fair, you’ll be going, ‘you know, we’re alright. We are dang near royalty.”
Jeff Foxworthy
My Strange Family
Of course, everyone’s family is strange, right?
Now and then I’ll remember some odd bit of my childhood. Then I’ll ask a friend if they had the same thing in their family. Always a firm no. In fact, they may have been a bit in-cred-u-lous.
Here are three odd things.
Do The Hula
When we were kids, sometimes my Dad would sing this hula song. It goes like this:
Here’s to the way that Amy does the hula.
Here’s to the way that Amy does the hula.
Do the hula.
Do the hula.
Let’s see Amy do the hula.
Then Amy would put her hands to one side and waggle her hips like a hula dancer.
But, it was sung kinda funny too. Like this:
Heeeeeeere’s to the way that David does the hula.
Heeeeeeere’s to the way that David does the hula.
Doooo the hula.
Doooo the hula.
Let’s see David do the hula.
It was sung fast! And the “doooo the hula” part sounds vaguely Hawaiian.
Poor Pussy
When I was a kid, I’d get mad and angry and outraged at how life is so unfair! I’d rant and rave and my Mom would come over and pat me on the head and say, “Poor Pussy”. Then she’d say, in a mocking voice, “Life is sooo unfair, I’m sooo sorry, pooor pussy”. It was so ridiculous that I’d begin to laugh. I’d get a hug and be on my way.
The Ten Dollar Word
My Dad called big words “ten dollar words”. I guess he meant that they were learned through higher education or that we all pay a price for using them. Because of this, the big words got noticed and … we’d drop them with the expectation of being noticed by over-pronouncing each syllable.
It was as if our pause was a drum roll.
“I don’t mean to be … pre-ten-tious.”
Heavy pause to get the notice for dropping a ten dollar word. Clearly communication was not the point at all!
Or “That was a bit … os-ten-ta-tious.”
What a strange family! I had fun.
Betcha your family had odd stuff too.
The Profound Bartender 
Ha! I love this. You “had” a strange family, and still have one! I was just remembering a day or two ago something mom would say (“How’s your budget” comes most quickly to mind, but it was another of her phrases which will come back to me through these fading synapses sometime soon…). Grandpa used to say “Well, I’ll be diddly damned.”
Dad used to call me a “gold brick”, when he thought I was goofing off or pretending to be sick. I wondered later in life where that term came from, and it was interesting to find out.
We are formed by our folks and our whole family. I feel mighty lucky that we were doing the hula and singing “Old folks, young folks, everybody come. Come to the Sunday school and have a lot of fun….and hearing about the flying red horse.
This was a fun piece to read Kubla!
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